David Berry founded and runs Dad’s Works, a program designed to teach fathers how to become better dads.
The age of television fathers like Jim Anderson, Ozzie Nelson and Ward Cleaver has passed into oblivion, according to Deborah Clark Vance, associate professor and department chair of communication at McDaniel College. In that day, fathers were portrayed as patriarchal. Their wives deferred to them; they were the problem solvers, the disciplinarians, the breadwinners.
“I think it is interesting that in the 60s there were those single fathers, with no wife present,” Vance said. “There was ÔBachelor Father,’ ÔThe Andy Griffith Show,’ ÔMy Three Sons.’ In a way, it was almost as if they were saying they really did not need women. They were still portrayed as problem solvers; working fathers, but also dealing with the kids.”
The model fathers of the 50s and 60s were gradually replaced by the Archie Bunkers, Al Bundys and Homer Simpsons, buffoon fathers, Vance said. The sitcoms were satires on “patriarchy.”
Vance said fathers in “Family Ties,” “Good Times,” “The Waltons,” “30 Something” and “The Cosby Show,” were depicted as involved, nurturing, concerned fathers. In contemporary television shows, fathers have moved from good to bad to evil. Vance said that in shows, such as “Six Feet Under” and “Weeds,” the fathers are absent and have left financial and emotional messes behind for the mothers to handle.
“Then there is Tony Soprano: not a very good dad É he is patriarchal and probably pretty harmful to his children,” Vance said. “A lot of them [fathers on TV] are unintentionally harmful to their children. That seems to be a predominant theme. Not only are they not ideal, they are destructive. Then you have Dexter: the serial killer as single father.”
The buffoon father remains a staple of sitcoms, she said. Ironically, a cartoon dad, Hank Hill, the father of the animated series, “King of the Hill,” is a better role model than the majority of dads, which is an odd commentary on fatherhood, she said.
“The images of ideal families from the 60s are so ingrained in our minds that today’s shows are, in some ways, a response to the insecurity we feel about our parents,” Vance said. “They are saying our parents are human; they are flawed and they messed us up.”
Michael Stovall, a professor of sociology at Carroll Community College and current chair of social sciences, said he worked in the human services field, in Frederick County, for 30 years. During that time, he was involved with Head Start and helped create a program to educate fathers.
Recent studies of primitive hunter-gather societies suggest that there was more interaction between fathers and children than previously believed, Stovall said. In tribal society the role of father was not only as a provider, but as a protector. To be able to protect the women and children, the men could not be separated from their families for extended periods of time or by great distance.
“In agrarian societies, men, women and children worked side-by-side in the fields,” Stovall said. “Both men and women were involved in care-giving for their children.”
“Some scholars have pointed out that we’ve written histories of children and mothers, but have largely neglected fathers,” Stovall said. “Men have been valued more for their other social roles, for their work, or leadership roles in politics or the military, rather than their role as fathers.”
In the 1800s and 1900s, men were valued as protectors and providers; women, as mothers and home makers, Stovall said. Those roles became solidified, in post-World War II America.
“The American economy took off and allowed families to live off the male bread-winner’s income,” Stovall said. “We think back to the 50s and 60s stereotypes of the model family, typified in ÔLeave it to Beaver’ and ÔThe Donna Reed Show.’”
By the 70s, women were better educated and had access to effective birth control. More entered the workforce, he said. That trend continues and redefines the roles of breadwinner, homemaker, father and mother.
“The average age men and women marry today, is 26 to 28,” Stovall said. “If you ask young women, today, to list their priorities for the future, they say Ôeducation’ and Ôcareer’, not Ôget married’ and Ôhave children’.”
New research indicates the current economic downturn has been “tougher on men than women.” Industrial-based, blue collar jobs, held predominantly by men, have dwindled, while jobs in the service industry, often held by women, have survived and even thrived, Stovall said. The result is a role-reversal, where the woman goes off to work and the man stays at home to take care of the house and rear the children.
“It may mean fathers are shifting over to provide more care for their children,” Stovall said. “That will probably equalize more of the responsibilities for the home duties.”
Dad’s Works, a program operated by the Carroll County Human Services Department, began in 2000. David Berry, its founder and director, said the program is designed to teach fathers how to be better dads.
“Our mission is helping fathers to be great dads,” Berry said, noting the program faces an uncertain future because of an imminent loss of funding. “I’ve always believed in building strong men to become strong fathers to form the backbone for strong families.”
Annually, about 125 men, most between 20 and 30 years old, and some fathers ranging in age from 16 to 55, complete the Dad’s Works program. The curriculum addresses interpersonal relationships and communication, self-esteem, parenting, decision making, finance management, responsibility, visitation and anger management, Berry said.
Berry said the goal is to help clients learn ways to cope and overcome obstacles to becoming responsible fathers. In some cases, there may be issues involving visitation, child support or marital discord.
“What I would like the public to know is that we are here as a support for fathers,” Berry said. “There are so many different types of fathers – step-dads, custodial dads, non-custodial dads, dads going through divorce, fathers who are grandfathers, fathers of special needs children; a broad spectrum of fathers.”
Biologically, women are better equipped to rear children, but there is a shift toward fathers taking the role of primary care-givers, said Cathy Orzolek-Kronner, chair of the social work department of McDaniel College. In addition to the loss of traditional jobs for men, women are finding careers in what had been male-dominated fields, she said.
Orzolek-Kronner said that rather than treating children as possessions, as they have through much of history, fathers and mothers view them as treasures. Fatherhood is a privilege. She applauded Bill Cosby, President Barack Obama and others who challenge men to step up and become responsible fathers.
“If we are honest with ourselves,” Obama said in 2008, “we’ll admit that… too many fathers also are missing – missing from too many lives and too many homes. They have abandoned their responsibilities, acting like boys instead of men. And the foundations of our families are weaker because of it.”
In that Father’s Day speech, Obama said that children without involved fathers are five times more likely to live in poverty and commit crime; nine times more likely to drop out of school and 20 times more likely to end up in prison. They are also more likely to have behavioral problems or run away from home.
Orzolek-Kronner said that comments made by Bill Cosby on the subject of absent fathers were criticized as being elitist, but she agrees with Cosby’s assessment that fathers play a huge role in teaching children to become responsible adults and responsible citizens.
Although fathers are taking an increased role in child-rearing, old habits die hard. If both parents are working and a child becomes ill, it is more acceptable for the woman to take off from work, Orzolek-Kronner said.
“Fathers are being encouraged to spend more time with children,” she said. “We see this in a greater flexibility in paternity leave, as well as more flexibility in work schedules. It is important to see fathers as nurturers, not only for boys, but for young girls, too. Fathers are models for how men should treat girls and women.”
